There is no sarcasm font

Hurt can cause irreparable effects that reverb. A ripple effect of sorts the way the betrayers can cover an enormous amount of ground, burden our hearts and steal our trust. One thing I have experienced professionally and by working online as a blogger and in social media is the power of hurt, betrayal. Our world has expanded across the globe yet shrunk since we all converse and collaborate online. However with working online and through electronic forms of communication we lose what is most important in our connection, the humanity. Unfortunately in email, posts, instant messages there is no tone, or sarcasm font.

We type out our emails, posts, messages and we can hear our own voices in our head, we can hear the tone. Somehow the tone is not transferred, or sometimes the tone is transferred improperly, in these transmissions. Sadly at the same time we then hit send to our recipient thinking nothing of the sorts.

Online transgressions are not limited to only our electronic correspondence. We have much of our business online as well. As bloggers we deal with people all the time. We put a great amount of faith and trust in people and never think twice about hurt or betrayal. How do we overcome? How do we learn to trust again?

I know my personal dealings ended painfully. Working hard to build a beautiful blog with a devout following for the messages I had to share, heart felt, raw, and real. When I opened myself to making “friends” online I was met with my past slapping me in the face as a way for those to seek revenge, to hurt me for their personal gain. My “friend” burned my contacts with falsities, attempted to burn my income, all in the name of pettiness. An act of high school retaliation because someone got her skirt in a ruffle. The part I played was that I would not play into girlish antics. I backed out tastefully, respectfully, calling the cards indicating my distaste and dissatisfaction for the events, the disrespect and that our relationship was truly not genuine or of a friendship.

This past year an online friend rekindled my trust and faith for the online world. My faith was even more broken as I was “voted off the island,” as my husband refers to my termination from corporate America. Shifting in moments of self pity, self deprecation, anger, rage, hurt. My friend pulled me back to show me a renewed faith and helped me rekindle my love for people once more. She encouraged me to seek my reinvention. Life was bigger than me, my Faith was telling me to believe. Believe that everyone deserved a second chance, delivering forgiveness, redeeming people as a whole instead of condemning them for a single bad egg of the bunch.

My friend showed me that not all two people are the same. Working online could be fulfilling again. I could write to my hearts content. I found my voice. I found my love which was once lost. I found I could continue to love people, empower them as I once did, share in their triumphs and trials, put feelings into words.

I found that I could trust again and work online with strangers, even if I did use some sarcasm font as a defense mechanism. When I came back to work with Joie, she encouraged me to become vulnerable again and lead the charge with other vulnerable bloggers who were just like me. Have you been scorned by people online? People in your “community?” Are you afraid of history repeating itself? Well know you are in good company as we are all in the midst of a great leap of faith to create something wonderful, powerful, moving. If we happen to trust again, give something bigger of ourselves and maybe forge friendships of the same caliber, success monetarily and professionally would just happen to be an afterthought with all we will gain on a personal level.

37 Replies to “There is no sarcasm font”

  1. Out of a group of 100 bloggers you may have 10 that are bad but they can make all 100 the most miserable people in the world. They can create chaos so easily and turn us into people we are not. Many of us in the Perks group have been burned and have a bad taste in our mouth right now. I hope that we call get over it, work together, and create something to be proud of.

  2. I’m not in the blogging business but life in general will find everyone has been burned or hurt at one time or another. We’re human so we will pull back and feel that hurt and ditrust everyone, for awhile. Then you learn not everyone is burdened by meaness and being vindictive. Feel sorry for those troublemakers and etc. I always tell my daughter to have faith and realize where these hurful actions are coming from. Nobody important. Thanks for your post. I always enjoy our postings.
    Carol L
    Lucky4750 (at) aol (dot) com

    1. Carol you are very right that tone and people of ill will happen anywhere, not just online. I think that’s the hard part is learning to trust again with the hurt because we guard our hearts. I am saddened that the actions of meanness are out of general insecurity but I think that’s a defense mechanism for some.

  3. I can never understand why people intentionally hurt others. I also believe jealously and insecurities are some of the reasons for this.

  4. Since I started reading blogs about a year ago, I’ve noticed how petty people can be. Although, since talking with people online and understanding that they can’t actually hear my tone and intonations I’ve stopped using sarcasm except with people that know me well. I’m glad you got back on the horse so to speak. People can be so mean and I’ll never understand that.

  5. It’s so sad how mean & petty some people can be.And for what ? Hoaw sad for them that these actions empower them. I’m glad you had your friend to lead you back. :)
    Carol L

  6. I have a big tendency to be very sarcastic the majority of the time. Most of my friends, online & in real life, know this is just a part of who i am & how i deal with things…but sometimes there are those who think (& tell me) that i’m just plain mean. I can’t change who i am & if some can’t handle that i’m sorry, but if they had to deal with all the health issues i deal with on a daily basis, i think they would probably know why i am the way i am. My sarcasm is usually not meant to hurt anyone, but in my opinion, people should get to know someone before they throw that first stone.

  7. this is a wonderful article. i think sometimes i am too sensitive, then next i am told i “have a smart mouth!” it is hard to do a balance act, and sometimes i wonder if it is really worth it. we have to interact with others, either in person, or online, so it is best to understand who you are, and give the others the benefit of the doubt, until they prove they are not worth it.

  8. I think we all get “voted off the island” on online sites. We are dealing with people who are not always meant to be in a public forum. They love the drama they can create and do not care who they hurt. We just have to be on the high road.

  9. This is a great post. Some people choose to hide behind their computer and say mean and hateful things. It has happened to me in a very public way.

  10. Wow, how that resonates with me! Sarcasm can be a form of disrespect and if you disrespect someone you surely can’t expect them to respect you.I have to watch my tongue (or my fingers) lest that nasty habit find a home there!

  11. I got reamed out one time because I posted a compliment to someone and it ruffled someone else’s feathers because they thought I was minimalizing their contribution to society by not complimenting them as well. Crazy silly, but it got a whole string of nastiness that I wasn’t even aware of until someone wrote my name in their post. I was highly surprised and upset that the whole thing occurred, but it’s just another example of how easy it is for someone to misunderstand a comment made online.

  12. It’s also hard to tell what someone meant because there is no inflection in typing like there is in speech. Makes it easy to get the wrong idea from reading a post.

  13. People can be very cruel. I know it is hard but we all need to let it roll off our shoulders. I think we are losing a great part of our life by not communicating face to face or on the phone so much. I hope this world wakes up soon and realizes this. We need people in our life

  14. I told a cousin about a conversation with my mother (mom and dad both told me I was adopted). That was my last conversation with my mom, she never spoke to me again, she passed. Another relative read the note, and I got a hate note back, stating how I defamed the family name, I was a liar, and I needed professional help with my hate issues, It was absolutely cruel.

  15. What I meant to say at the end of the above statement, we never know how someone will perceive the words we speak. We are all human, and life is too short to not let things slide. You never know what is happening in the other persons life or mind.

  16. I think it’s easy to get hurt online because the things that are said go public and that’s something on a bigger scale that’s hard to deal with.It’s different than a one on one difference of opinion.

  17. I understand this all too well. Things can be said that don’t translate over text all too good and in turn feelings get hurt. I know people say that an opinion of a person shouldn’t matter if you’ve never met them, but online relationships and opinions do indeed matter. No one likes feeling as if they’re being looked down on or judged any time.

  18. I love this post. I’m not a blogger but I admire all the work that goes into it. People can sit behind a computer and say hurtful things.

  19. I am not a blogger. However, I am an independent consultant, animal advocate and crossposter on facebook. I have had my share of sarcastic and seriously mean and hateful remarks directed at my heart. At first, it really hurt. I have gotten rid of dead wood, including some family in order to be able to enjoy what I am doing. Some people are born to be hateful!!!

  20. I am not a blogger, but I believe that you have to be optimistic and give people a chance. Otherwise you could miss out on some great friendships and/or opportunities.

  21. I learned a great deal about the downside of blogging and just plain mean and dishonest bloggers, by reading the bad experiences of a few other bloggers. I don’t blog but know I am very sensitive as a person and that would make me very cognizant to work and play well with others! I’m working on letting the criticism just roll off my back and not take things personally but it’s a daily battle.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.